How To: Remove Self-Tanner

So you’re a skin-savvy lady who decided to get your glow on cancer-free with some fake tanner. Good for you! Unfortunately, your new orange splotches have left you looking like an Oompa-Loompa. Hey, even Lindsay Lohan’s been there!

Here’s your all-in-one contingency plan for getting your skin back to normal after a self-tanning accident:

For sunless tanner stained hands, knees, elbows or feet:

• Try some Orange Goop. It’s a solvent car mechanics use to get grease off their hands (luckily, my hubby used to work on trucks and had some stashed in the garage!) It works especially well on callused areas like feet, elbows or the palms of your hands.
• Fingernails can collect color like nuts, so start by removing dead skin around them with a cuticle clipper. For stained nail beds, soak them in some Polident (the denture stuff – I’m not kidding) and scrub the beds with a toothbrush afterward.
• Lemon juice is an excellent natural lightening treatment for thicker skin on elbows and knees, and works in over-bronzed situations for feet and hands too.
• Scrub your knees, elbows, feet and hands with some baking soda and water, making sure to get in between your fingers. If you don’t have any baking soda, try an exfoliating scrub; it does the same job.
• From now on, wash your hands thoroughly after every application of self-tanner.

For stains on your face and/or neck:

• My favorite surefire remedy for facial splotches: astringent. Rub an astringent or toner with salicylic acid (I use Biore Triple Action Astringent) over the stain with a cotton ball. Sounds simple, but it works wonders!
• Facial products with AHAs or BHAs like NeoStrata’s AHA Skin Solution are excellent for removing any kind of blotchiness. Apply before bed and you’ll see a drastic improvement the next morning.
• Exfoliate! Any exfoliating facial scrub or mask will help to slough off the dead skin that’s collected extra pigment. (Please stick to exfoliants specially formulated for your face, though — those meant for the body are usually too harsh.)
• If you have to leave the house before you can ditch the streaks, hide anything too grotesque-looking with bronzer. Blended properly, you’ll look naturally glowing without a hint of splotchiness.

If your whole bod is dark or streaky:

• Soak in the tub with some epsom salt or a mineral bath salt added to the water. This will soften your skin and help excess pigmentation break free as you wash.
• Splotchy legs? Try a fresh shave! Shaving your legs has a similar effect to exfoliating and will lift the hair up out of the follicle, helping to release any tanner trapped in there.
• Try a salt or sugar-based body scrub to remove the color. (Don’t worry if you come out looking a bit red afterward – that’ll fade quickly.) Top irritated skin with an unscented body lotion if you’re feeling a bit itchy.